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4 Minor Things I Just Can’t Do

January 29, 2016

I’ve had some minor accomplishments in my life: I’ve managed to save a little for some trips here and there; I can pretty much say “no” to agents without any guilt; I’ve managed to use ink on my drawings though still practicing on it; and well, I’m enjoying my writing style right now.

I have now come to believe that I can do anything as long as I put my mind and heart to it. However, there are things I just can NOT do even if I tried.

  1. Make hands meet at back

To be specific, it’s when my right is below my shoulder, and my left above. They just won’t reach. Four inches apart is the nearest my fingers can actually go. My instructor once told me to do stretching on my right shoulder for 10 minutes every morning, and even after 2 months of doing so, there were no improvements. And on those 2 months, my right shoulder was a little weaker than usual with some muscle tears. So, that is one of my more recent disappointing realizations.

2. Spit

When we catch a respiratory infection, be it as common as a cold or as bad as tonsillitis, mucus build up in our lungs and sinuses. Mind you though, I am an expert in nasal expulsion of multi-colored mucus. However, I just cannot spit it out. My success rate is exactly 13%; the rest of my attempts are just me gagging with vomit-like coughs, spitting out nothing. You know what happens after that? That’s right, it just slides down.

Did I gross you out? All right!

I am secretly jealous of those who can make a good-sounding, hearty accumulation of sputum, and expel it like gum. I’m in my 30s and I’m still practicing something that I should have mastered as an art when I was a child. I fail in that department, and I’d like to apologize to my body.

3. Synchronize hands and mouth

I can play the piano and the guitar, but my skill is limited: I can neither read notes nor chords, but I play by eyes. I watch how the hands pluck, strum, finger, and work from there. I am not sure if that is the cause why I can’t sing along, but when I do start, my hands lose the sequence. I try and shift my concentration on timing the instrument, but then I realize that I’ve stopped singing.

It’s a cruel loop. Though I understand that this only needs practice, I just think my body was made for muscle memory. Similar to dancing, I can’t make steps on-the-fly, but my body can pretty much move well enough to learn new ones.

4. Cross my toes

I can’t, for the life of me, cross my toes, mostly the big toe with the toe next to it (the pointer toe?). I think mine is a bone structure limitation rather than muscle, but I’ve given up trying. I will stop discussing about this. It frustrates me horribly.

I’ve accepted the fact that I am less of a human for having an inflexible right shoulder, lack in coordination with both my hands and mouth, limited toe movement, and practically unable to spit at any of these imperfections.

Usually I’d end on a high note, leaving hope for myself mostly, but for this article, I’ll leave this as is. I think it’s healthy to realize that we are, in fact, imperfect.

I’m interested to know though: How about you? What can’t you do? 😉

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From → About me, English, For fun

5 Comments
  1. hahahah… fun read druuuuu! 😀

  2. OH.. since you’re not on FB.. I’ll just tag you here…

    https://colloquieswiththewall.wordpress.com/2016/02/19/10-qa-bottles-of-beer-on-the-wall/

    baka you wanna do an entry LOL

  3. I can’t cross my eyes. I can make them go to opposite directions though…
    Still thinking about 3 more… I’ll probably use this topic as well for my next blog haha if you don’t mind.. then TAG people to do the same hahahah

    • Really? And here I was thinking you were a master at it.

      And that 30 day blogging challenge is indeed a challenge XD I couldn’t even come up with anything to talk about every few days. Haha

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